anxiety, depression, Health, lifestyle, pcos, Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, stress

Times of Panic

This house is like a ticking time bomb. Our son has tested positive for Covid-19. He did not have the normal symptoms. He did not have the fever, cough, or shortness of breath that they tell you about. He had a very bad headache and some GI issues. They only tested him because he works in health care. I’m not going to lie, both my husband and I were a bit upset as he was not doing social distancing very well. But, we also were not the best role models because we were still going to my parents to see our dogs. Tuesday will be a whole week since I have seen him, even though he is just downstairs. Luckily, he has had a mild case and seems to be on the mend.

On the other hand, panic has set it. My husband and I never know if what we are feeling is us getting sick with Covid or if we are stressed or if it is just allergies. I was supposed to have sinus surgery before this all started, so sinus issues have not been very good. We are constantly taking our temperatures. Last night, I had such a bad panic attack that I nearly had my husband call an ambulance or take me to the ER. I am hoping that none of us get it.

It has been hard to focus on school. My research questions were accepted right away with no changes. Now I need to figure out a new qualitative research method and research that that method to write up my methodology by next week.

I am trying so hard to be okay. When we moved in, this house was my sanctuary. Now, I can barely sit in the living room or go into the kitchen. I know this all will pass, but right now it is hard. Since Covid has come into this house, it no longer feels like my safe place. I was so excited that we had made this house look so nice and have this nice living area to be in. Now, I have been stuck in the bedroom waiting to get sick. I am not feeling positive at all lately. I am trying. I will continue to try.